Archive | June, 2012

Faith- Song lyrics

27 Jun

Pain:

A sweet and oily ominous warning.

Trust:

Abandon, all surrendering, nothing knowing.

Blood:

Poisonous, precious, life and death,

Slow coursing, cycling,

Pure and light-filled.

 

Love.

Of all these, love.

Love.

 

Touch of skin warm with life,

Laughter floating formed in strife,

Ever failing ever ripe,

Deeper, deeper, deeper, still.

Deeper, deeper, deeper, still.

 

Love.

Of all these, love,

Love.

 

Gaze at you lit with life,

Tears outpouring, all is right,

Always living all ways life,

Higher, higher, higher, still.

Higher, higher, higher, still.

 

Trust

Abandon all-surrendering, nothing knowing.

 

Love.

Of all these, love,

Love.

 

 

 

 

Written June 16, 2012

By Tina Watkins

YAY!

26 Jun

Today has been an awesome day.

It was even more awesome than yesterday.

Yesterday was even more awesome than the day before it.

This, leads me to believe tomorrow will be even more awesome than today was.

That is what makes being excited for every new moment, because the moment you’re in is so great,

SO

MUCH

FLIPPIN’

FUN!

YAY!!! 

Gifted: Honoring others who embrace and share their gifts

25 Jun

When I sing, I completely abandon myself and transcend to another level of being.  For most of my life, I denied this and other talents, refusing to be put in a box as a singer, writer, artist, fashion designer, dancer, cook, or anything else on the shelf.  None of it fit.  I realize now, all of it does.  For some of us, embracing our talents and sharing our gift with the world comes later in life, for others early.  No matter your journey, be encouraged!

Every minute, everyday, you have a new chance to make your gift useful.

This morning, I was struck by an exquisite onslaught of wisdom from a cadre of young, beautiful, and talented friends of mine.  As I experienced the evidence of their shining talent I thought and felt, deep within:

Ah.

Guess what the names of these wonderful ladies are?

Khalilah

Lisa

Tilesha

Shaun-Teka

ChéLa

Crescent.

Oh, you thought I was flattering and biased?  These women are truly beautiful inside and out, they are well-educated, awesome human beings who inspire me.

Loveliness defined:

Ah- Used to express delight, relief.

Ent- Combining form: inner : within.

Today, I honor them by encouraging you to visit their expressions on life, well-being, love, joy, politics, and more.

Here are six gifts, for you, for free!

Khalilah

Lisa

Tilesha

Shaun-Teka

ChéLa

Crescent

Enjoy!

Flying high: Navigating and surrendering to change.

22 Jun

When pilots navigate, they steer the plane based on information they can trust.  Information that is so certain and infallible, if it were ever inaccurate that would be the least of their troubles.

I can only imagine the vertigo and confusion to be found in ascending to such a height, then trying to move forward by squinting back down at Earth, trying to make sense of landmarks gone before you see them.

I can only imagine the disorientation and malfunction caused by misunderstanding or ignorance of trusted information provided, searching frantically for a guide, direction, of any kind in the chaos.

I can only imagine the danger and risk inherent in resistance, questioning the information provided and ultimately crossing arms over chest, shutting eyes and refusing to engage.

We are always growing, changing, developing in ways we couldn’t dream or imagine.  In the midst of change we are strengthened in the knowledge that while everything we know slips away, we have trusted information to rely on to get us to our destination so we must surrender and stay engaged.

We should always make sure to rely only on those infallible, unquestionable truths in life.

If ever there’s a question, this is the best source.

Nothing really matters…

21 Jun

Somehow, I found a man way better than I ever dreamed and fell in love with him.  He fell in love with me, thank goodness or that would have been awkward.  Since a few months before we realized we were head-over heels for each other, our friends, family, and random strangers have commented regularly on how powerful our display of love and appreciation for one another is.

We’re both open, cheesy, sappy romantics, and are best friends to boot.  We are far, far from perfect but even our worst moments have been miraculously love-filled, love-deepening experiences.

I think the world of this man. He is incredibly handsome, sweet, brilliant, caring, talented, powerful, God-fearing, communicative, intuitive, loyal, strong, successful, and downright hilarious.

It is common to find me staring at him with that goopy-eyed mess reserved for cartoons with hearts reverberating from the character’s eyes.

On top of generally having a deep appreciation for who he is as a man, friend, artist, and spirit, I’ve been very intentional about demonstrating my appreciation for every big and little thing he does.  I take special care to show appreciation for being open about the bad times.

I’ve showered this man with the (second-) deepest love and affection I could muster, from supporting and encouraging his spiritual walk, career, relationships, and personal development, to feeding every plane of his existence.

Our relationship has been the journey of a lifetime and it’s still only a toddler.

There’s nothing like a wake-up call to add a little perspective.  

I realized recently that in spite of all that, I had been taking him for granted.

Not in the obvious, shallow sense.  It was much more simple and profound.  The reality simply never sunk in that one day he won’t be around. Not that we might break up or that we might have to make it work long distance.  Not alive.

The realization and acceptance of mortality is the most effective reminder of what it means to truly appreciate someone.

I found myself moved to tears by the warmth of the skin covering his hand as I held it.  The simple awareness that as I gazed on him sleeping peacefully, he was alive, his mind and heart fully functioning.  The open joy of hearing him snore and knowing it means he’s breathing deeply.

It’s a scary feeling to look into the eyes of the person you depend on and find they are incapable of finding yours.  Every glance after that is a love story.

Thankfully, along with the basic indicators of vitality we can also still enjoy the many other wonders that make our life together so joyous and purposeful.

Still, I pray I never forget that feeling, of knowing the ocean only runs so deep, of touching the bottom of the ocean floor, and knowing it can’t be danced upon.

I pray that forever, I weigh the importance of my choices against the value of life.

I guess, because it’s so hard, it makes stuff really easy.

Not much matters.

Maybe that’s why children and older folks are so carefree and intentional all at once.  The beginning and ending of life is free of distraction from what’s most important.

What are you taking for granted?

What have you not acknowledged as impermanent?

What would you revel in with that realization?

Smeagol or Gollum: 5 Steps to overcome self-doubt.

20 Jun

I recently, finally, watched The Lord of the Rings Trilogy and was struck by the symbolism of the tormented character of Smeagol and Gollum.  Physically, mentally, and spiritually this is a man who gave in once to darkness, became addicted to it, and wasted away, his very identity shattered in a desperate attempt to protect his life.

His outward appearance is of Gollum:

Rotting and unhealthy, obsessed with the one thing he believes is most important to him: A sense of personal power and importance found in his precious ring.  As the story unfolds, other characters recognize his true identity as the healthy young man, Smeagol.

They insist on relating to him in that identity.  After he grapples initially with self-loathing, he embraces the idea that he can turn from darkness.  He walks (literally) in the identity of the cheerful, helpful Smeagol until someone treats him as Gollum and he snaps, opening back up to darkness and oppression.

This was extreme, but it highlighted a universal truth:

All of us are growing, changing, developing constantly.  The biggest threat to our growth and development is us.  Any number of things may happen around and to us, but we alone choose how those events shape us, how treatment affects us, and especially what defines us.

It’s only when we believe the lie that we aren’t growing, changing and developing in new and wonderful ways that we risk succumbing to something we aren’t.

Maybe your Gollum is a procrastinator, an over-eater, adulterer, or self-sabotager.  If you’ve been consistently overcoming that, trust and believe that is your true identity.  It won’t be easy, because chances are you’ve been trusting and believing you were Gollum way longer than you should.

The challenge is, because you were acting like and living like Gollum, there will be people who treat you like you haven’t changed.  Worse, they may have a terrible moment and tell you so.

It will matter to you.

It will get under your skin because in this new identity, you are still purging self-doubt and fear… So for an instant, you might wonder whether they’re telling the truth.  They aren’t.

Here are the five steps you take to deal with self-doubt:

1) Remind yourself that no man or woman alive is truly qualified to pass judgment on your identity, and the one true judge is the definition of endless, pure and unconditional love who thinks you’re more awesome than you could ever believe.

2) Affirm yourself by saying you are your new identity, listing the qualities of that identity, and displaying those qualities.

3) Forgive the person who judged you, and pray for them to forgive themselves, and to find true love, peace, clarity and discernment.

4) Forgive yourself for doubting you.

5) Peacefully and lovingly allow space to come between the two of you.  This is important, because when someone condemns or judges you, your relationship is a lie.  No different than if you were to put on a mask and talk through a speech modifier: They don’t know you, but have convinced themselves you’re something you aren’t.  How can you relate to someone who believes their version of reality supersedes all else?

Judgment is nothing more than a filter of negative experience and expectation that jumbles thought, behavior and speech.  When we live free of expectation and full of forgiveness, judgment in ourselves and others becomes intolerable, and that’s a great thing.

Because instead of entering the sticky web of judgment, we see reminders to pray for one another, to uplift one another, to improve ourselves and those around us.

That rocks.

10 Steps: How to eliminate distraction from purpose

19 Jun

Why? Why not? How important is this really?

These questions should be the most frequently asked questions of our day.  In answering them, we have to consider our purpose and that consideration naturally pushes our actions and behaviors in the right direction.

Yet, unless we’re in the middle of a crisis or vacation it seems these questions rarely come up.

Crises and vacations have a lot in common with one very large distinction:

Choice.

In crises and vacations, the mundane banalities of life disappear.  All you’re left with is yourself, whoever you choose to invite along, and wherever you happen to be.

In both scenarios, with the dull monotonous haze that creeps into everyday life washed clean, life is suddenly clutter-free.  Anything introduced to this clear, open space is immediately questioned, justification of its presence demanded.

In both scenarios, we become acutely aware of wasted time and energy, useless pursuits, fruitless thoughts and activities.  In full control of everything we choose to engage, all we do becomes saturated with the brilliant hue of meaning and life.

In both scenarios, we become free and uninhibited, compelled to do, say and explore things we wouldn’t ordinarily consider.  Unbound by planning and expectations, every moment is a new opportunity for a beautiful and unexpected experience.  We dream fully, open to new thoughts and ideas.

Yet, how do we enter these scenarios, and how intentional are we about using them for optimal strategic benefit?

When we vacation, we carefully choose and plan timing, location, etc based on existing commitments, budget, availability, etc.  Vacation should be a time to retreat and drink in life, to advance with refreshed perspective.  Ideally we would realize a holiday is essential when a higher new perspective is needed, and would choose to retreat from the day-to-day.  Instead, we allow the day-to-day to dictate when and how we ascend to higher perspective.

We don’t choose to enter crisis.

We find ourselves gulped down into the middle of it, propelled up and outward from it, free-falling in a whirlwind of change, newness, trust, prayer.  Yet we invariably emerge with a higher, refreshed perspective.

Sometimes we aren’t allowed to wait until we decide to give the little every day things a rest, so we can finally focus on the overall purpose of it all.  Sometimes those things are forced aside so we simply find ourselves asking.

Why? Why not?  How important is this really?

We don’t need to be in China, Paris, Israel, Australia, or Jamaica to think carefully about what we choose to do with our time.  Nor do we need to be promoted, bedridden, grieving, overjoyed, or in a hospital to choose what we’re doing, what’s really important in our lives, what isn’t, and why.

Start today.  Grab a pen and paper and sit with your spouse, friend, or advisor.

A) Start by answering the question: How can I use my unique gifts to show how awesome God is?  This might take a minute to uncover.  Give it time.  This is the beginning of defining your purpose.

B) Then, identify how you spend your time (whether you like the activity or not) by four categories:

  1. What is in line with my purpose?
  2. What is purpose-neutral?
  3. What do I really want to do and is it in line with my purpose?
  4. What is out of line with my purpose?

C) Set a waking time frame (for example 24 hours minus 8 for sleep/ eating).  This is your daily purpose shift, or realistically, how long you spend moving toward or away from purpose.  The things you do during your shift will vary widely because maintaining your spiritual, mental, physical and emotional health, your relationships, and identity are as critical to your purpose as each obvious step you take toward it.

D) Estimate the time spent on each activity listed in category 1.  Add up the time and subtract it from your daily purpose shift.

E) Consider each activity in category 2: Is the activity tied to a unique gift of yours, and if so, how can it be tweaked so it becomes purpose-filled?   If not, move it into category 4.  If so, tweak it and estimate the time spent on it. Add the time and subtract it from the daily purpose shift.

F) Consider each activity in category 3: If it’s an activity that’s aligned with your purpose, estimate the amount of time you’d need to spend for the activity to be productive.  Add this time up and subtract it from your daily purpose shift.

G) Consider each activity in category 4: Commit to either severely limit, or eliminate the time spent on everything in that category.  Add this time up and subtract it from your daily purpose shift.

H) Consider how much time is left, pray for direction on readjustments, and make them.

I) Post this list somewhere visible, like the inside of a bathroom medicine cabinet, the fridge, as a screensaver, or at your desk.

J) Use the power of choice daily to fill your life with meaning.

The mid-year mark: June 2012

18 Jun

On Tuesday June 5th at 1:30am life changed forever.  That hour marked the beginning of new understanding in trust, love, faith, peace, strength, and grace.

I thought I knew.

On Tuesday June 5th at 1:30am the world began to shift: From certain, promised and planned to nothing and everything, all at once.

I thought I believed.

Hours passed and everything dependable disappeared.  Faith was all.  Like a free-fall without parachute I fell free, into His goodness, trusting patiently.

I thought I loved.

On Tuesday June 5th, at 1:30am I was reminded that nothing is promised, life is not what it appears.  Days dragged and the simple blessing of life, captured in love’s look, touch and word overwhelmed.

I thought I was strong.

On Tuesday June 5th at 1:30am my core liquefied: A boiling rage of power releasing soothing mist, with forceful depths supporting life-giving earth.  A week passed.  Emptiness settled.  Cold, uncaring, blaming.  I cried for help.

I thought I had a voice.

Wrenched from me in gasping tears, quieted in shame-filled thoughts, stilled in desperate longing, weighted in fervent prayer, lifted in soaring praise, screaming in anguished pain, a powerful call sounded and my voice left me.

It isn’t mine.

That Tuesday marked the beginning of a new, brilliant journey as unfamiliar and unsettling as ever new beginnings are.

Everything washed clean.

A tremendous reaching from Earth’s core to draw roots deeper, from Heaven’s light to pull, lifting higher.

Just two weeks ago, the most important person in my life was nearly lost and we still don’t know the cause.

We knew why.

When you have power, live in purpose, your life becomes a threat.

When you are threatening, any number of strategies may be used to eliminate that threat: By claiming your life, silencing your voice, holding you hostage,  decimating your strength.

When you’re in the middle of the battlefield, it’s easy to lose sight of where your most powerful weapons and soldiers are.

When that happens you retreat to take inventory, identify who’s on your side, rethink your strategy, and come up whoopin’ ass.

That’s how the middle of 2012 unfolded.

I’m looking forward to the rest of the year: Of life.

Grateful for what the year has brought so far.

 

When it all falls away: the importance of a firm foundation

7 Jun

They say a man’s true character is tested when he has everything. The true quality of a man’s spirit shines when he has nothing.

What do you depend on in life, and from where do you draw strength, peace and clarity? When it all falls away… When you’re alone with nothing you discover true power: in the truth that you always have everything, and are never alone.

When it all falls away… The foundation of your life is exposed. When that foundation is firm, strong, unshakeable you can revel in its wondrous beauty, humbled, affirmed, awestruck… Overjoyed.

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Why I love a challenge…

5 Jun

Who bothers to argue with a fool?  Who cares about something worthless?  Who starts a fight when there’s no foe to face?

If you weren’t a worthy opponent, the opposition wouldn’t bother with you.

If you’re being challenged it means you’re worthy of being tested, there’s more for you.

Don’t be discouraged by challenges you face: See them as reminders you’re still alive and fighting.

The war is not over.

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