Tag Archives: life

Habitual Thinking: A fruitful mind feeds on fruit.

4 Apr

An old(ish) Adam Sandler movie, of all things, got me inspired to write about: Habitual thinking and how life-changing it can be to simply change the way you think;  How important rest is; How rest influences what we do when we’re not resting.

Now it’s time for practical steps.

Trust me, everyone needs to change their thinking habits.  Every day.  First of all, most of us have a lifetime worth of bad habits built in.  That means we’ve trained our minds to work wrong for decades.

How our minds work: In my high school physics class our professor had us build Rube Goldberg machines.  It was awesome.  You basically setup a small(ish) machine that does a simple household thing like turning off a light.  But it starts with a single object that goes through a series of crazy domino effects. Ultimately, the object, once it’s finished bouncing, flaming, steaming and bopping around, causes the simple household thing to be done.

This is basically how our minds work: We take one thing in to get us thinking (image/movie/book/conversation/etc.) and a lot of different things happen in a chain reaction to produce an outcome (feeling/ action/ speech etc.)  But the way we think, our habits are based on whatever life handed us.

Yikes.

So typically, we all have maybe a few of these thinking machines: Us at our best, us at our worst, and us on an average day.  Those are our habitual thought patterns, or autopilot space.  And we use them automatically, because they’re convenient and we literally don’t have to think about it.

But let’s say those machines or habitual thoughts are causing problems, like emitting poisonous gas… Or horrible ideas?  Or self-sabotage, self-defeat?

Your mind should produce fruit, not waste:

Like our digestive system, what we put or allow into our mind has an effect.  Depending on what we eat or drink, we may gain weight, have an allergic reaction, become intoxicated, energized, sick… Or healthier, more fit.

Depending on the information and concepts we feed our mind, we may become heavy-minded or react badly to the point of being uncomfortable…  We may malfunction and get out of touch with reality, have racing thoughts, or even a mental breakdown however minor or major… Or become more joyful, more at peace, clear, brilliant.

With our digestive system our organs are pretty much always going to do the same thing with food and drink: Help our bodies sift through what we put into it and pass out waste.  We have to produce bodily waste and we can’t change that.

A fruitful mind feeds on fruit:

But our minds are different.  We can change the way our mind works so we never produce waste.

We don’t have to let in anything that creates a waste byproduct.

We don’t have to turn anything into waste once it’s let in.

What we take in matters a lot.  What our mind does with it once it’s taken in matters even more.  If you’ve ever had a bad day that seems to start from the moment you wake up, or been swallowed by grief, you know exactly what I mean.  Everything, no matter how extremely wonderful it is, will appear opposite because of your mindset.

That’s what happens all day every day when your mind is wired to produce waste instead of fruit.

Rewiring it isn’t hard, but it does take persistence.

Mind-food:

The music, lyrics, TV shows, movies, articles, facebook and twitter info, people, conversations, books and gatherings we let in are all literally food for thought.  So what’s in your mind diet?  Why?  If it isn’t full of encouragement, honesty, optimism, you’ve opted into the McDonald’s version of food for thought.  It will not supersize your mind.

I know we’re passively fed information through advertisements, media, and our environment constantly but we don’t have to be.  Exercise some control over what you’re exposed to so the balance shifts positively, for just a day.  Feel the difference.  Keep it up.

The world seems full of terrible tragedies, hurt, and pain, yes.  But it’s really full of love, inspiration, joy, overcoming and miracles.  That’s not what we’re fed by the news, talk shows, music, or movies… Or even, sometimes, our friends and family.

You deserve to be uplifted every second of every day.  To be told how amazing and wonderful you are.  To believe how capable, and powerful you are.  To be fearless.  Unafraid of failure.  To be shown new and inspiring ways to be better, bigger, a more awesome you than you already are.

If you feel repelled by those things, why?

It’s just you.  You can fight it, but it’ll still be the reality of who you are.

Love on yourself.

Begin the fruitful process of changing your thought habits by changing your mind-fuel.  Then we’ll talk about making sure our thoughts always produce fruit.

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Never alone: Always in love.

14 Feb

HeartRomance begins with you.

Love on yourself today and everyday, so your relationship reflects healing and wholeness now and in the future.

Relationships are not two people completing each other.  They are two hearts reflecting two spirits, enhanced.  So the condition of your spirit is magnified.

If it isn’t right alone, it will just be worse with someone else.

Relationships are not two people using themselves up in an attempt to offer fleeting earthly symbols of love for each other.  They are two friends, walking, running, dancing, resting, and stumbling together down the path of life, learning, changing, loving, and drinking in the glory as they go.

If the journey isn’t more important than the destination you’ll end up attached and lonely all at once.

So to everyone every day, who celebrates love with the simple act of thinking, nourishing, cleansing, smiling, caring, changing, listening, giving, feeling, trying…

For themselves, others and the world especially when these, the easiest things seem hardest to do and at that moment for that reason, matter most…

Thank you.

I love you.

‘Cause you’re alive and that means you’re worthy of it.

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Temptation ain’t coercion. If you’re tempted it’s because there was a desire inside you for it in the first place.

31 Jan

Recently I shared about the enemy within, and how dangerous it is to live in denial.
It’s a weak, disadvantaged position to deny and confuse what temptation really is, and approach it as though we’re helplessly forced into something we want no part of… Instead of masterfully commanding our lives like the rulers of the Earth we are born to be.
So, to be clear:
Tempt: To entice to do wrong by promise of pleasure or gain.

Coerce: To restrain or dominate by force.

I hate avocado.  A thousand perfect avocados won’t tempt me.  I could be coerced to eat one.  And I’d still hate avocados.
I do love chocolate.  The perfect chocolate soufflé will be darn tempting.  I’d have to be coerced not to eat it.  My family history of diabetes does indeed cause me to restrain myself.

We can only be tempted by what we already want.  Knowing something is bad for you doesn’t mean your heart won’t desire it.  Which isn’t a huge deal when it comes to food preference.

But there are things in our lives that are a very big deal, that can kill us if we don’t master them.  We can’t master anything if we don’t know what we’re dealing with.

It’s dangerous to confuse temptation for coercion.

Temptation is attractive, pulling you toward something you want.  Coercion is combative, forcing you to do something against your will.  These are two completely different challenges with different solutions: One within you, the other without.

Temptation is solved by finding and fixing whatever’s broken inside that makes us want what isn’t good for us.  Coercion is solved by identifying the threat and either staying the heck away from it or fighting back.

It’s dangerous to think that because your mind knows something your heart wants is wrong, you don’t really want it.  You cannot be forced to desire or do something you actually want to do: You are willing and complicit.

Responding to that in confusion is more dangerous than the external attacks you face, where you really do have to fight back.  Confused, you’ll respond with a losing strategy that weakens you at the same time it strengthens your wrongful desire.

Hot mess.

That’s what happens when you just face the temptation and resist it, or escape, running in the opposite direction without dealing with the root problem:  Why you want something bad for you.  Ultimately, resisting or avoiding just makes the problem worse.

Only as upright as your circumstances, you’ll still want it, but now you’re playing games to sidestep landmines.

That is the losing game of avoiding temptation: I just won’t go near such-and-such, won’t buy blah-blah-blah, won’t do blankety-blank… You can’t win because the problem is not it.  It’s you.  Wanting it.  And playing games with it can actually deepen its hold over you.

No one wants to hurt themselves.

The reality is, if something is broken inside of you, that brokenness will war with the truth like a sinister fun-house mirror, presenting reality as a fantasy.

That’s why you’ll believe temptation won’t really hurt you.

  • No overweight person wants to gain weight.  Brokenness will show you weight gain as a self-indulgent, orgasmic and sumptuous gift of nourishment.
  • No married person wants to get a divorce.  Brokenness will show you divorce as a once-in-a-lifetime secret sexual fantasy that will fuel desire for your spouse.
  • No drug abuser wants to overdose.  Brokenness will show you overdosing as a sweetly spiraling surrender into bliss.
  • No violent person wants to end up in the hospital.  Brokenness will show you fatal injury as righteous revenge exacted by a powerfully courageous warrior.

I don’t know about you, but I’ma need every which-kind of anyway broken anything up out of my system.  As of last year.

Because there is no little bit, no just once, not a big deal with what’s bad for you.

Bad is a raging and ravenous animal that is insatiable and violent, constantly calculating ways to eat you alive… And get you to serve up your friends and loved ones as seconds.

Partnering with that is a really.

Really.

Really.

Bad idea.

The tricky part is if we knew where these broken parts were and how to heal them, we’d have done it already.

So let’s go:

  1. Clear the clutter out of the way: Fast.
  2. Ask for help: Pray.

If there were a rattle in your car you couldn’t identify, you wouldn’t park it in the driveway and watch a show about car repair.  At some point you gotta get under the hood.  You clear it out, and take it to a mechanic to identify the problem and make the necessary repairs.

The spiritual version of parking the car and watching a do-it-yourself show is religiously going to church without fasting and praying constantly.

Fasting isn’t some strange and dangerous celebrity diet.  It’s cleansing, offering and sacrifice.  Our minds and bodies are our own, we can’t forget that and fail to take control over ourselves.  Why shouldn’t we offer up the vessel for our spirit when we need work done?  Choose something, anything whether it’s a habit, food, drink, activity, or even a person, and cut it out until your healing comes.

Praying isn’t some pious religious ritual set aside for priests and fanatics when they’re in quiet time with their eyes closed in temple or church.  We were born to pray, and can every moment.  At some point we get coerced into thinking prayer, our communication with the Creator, isn’t the most valuable part of our makeup.  Everyone hears from God, everyone can talk to Him.  So ask Him to find your brokenness and heal it.  Every single day. Multiple times a day.

We can’t afford to confuse temptation for coercion.  If you know you want things that are bad for you, fast and pray until you’re healed.

There’s far more to life than exhaustion in battle with yourself over wars that have already been won.

Free yourself.

“‘Rather, each person is being tempted whenever he is being dragged off and enticed by the bait of his own desire. 15 Then, having conceived, the desire gives birth to sin; and when sin is fully grown, it gives birth to death. 16 Don’t delude yourselves, my dear brothers.’”

We often view temptation as an external influence that ‘happens upon us.’ In truth temptation is an outward manifestation of a pre-existing desire already INSIDE of us. Our first instinct is to remove whatever it is that is tempting us from our environment. This is no different than watering the leaves to make a plant grow instead of the roots. Some of the water may trickle down the stem and make it into the ground but it is not the most effective way to achieve the goal. The real battle with all temptation takes place inside of us. We must examine the want for whatever it is that tempts us and start from there.

Eliminating objects of temptation from our environment is a means but the end is when we want what God has in store for us more than ANYTHING.

If we have a want for something that is greater than what God has in store for us it is that very want that will kill our walk every time.

We must continue to hold our desires up to what God wants for us and see where our heart truly stands.

We will all be tempted but we do not have to fall.

We can choose to stand by what God wants for us over what we want.

It’s all about faith…”-Ebenezer Quaye

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Empowering choice with affirmation: Accept only who and what affirms your best you.

9 Jan

Most of us spend too much of our lives surrounded by stuff we don’t feel we can really choose for ourselves.  Partly because we feel forced to choose from a limited selection among family, school, friends, work, or church.

When we finally reach a place where we recognize our decisions are truly our own, options limitless, it’s freeing.

The idea of saying “Yes” to something new and purposed for the best you is encouraging and life-affirming.  It’s huge and all too rare to fully embrace change, for the better.  Some folks never do.  Once you have, it’s equally important to reject static, for the best.

That’s tough.  The idea that your “Yes” also needs to be reinforced and empowered by saying “No” to things that are old and not purposed for the best you, is daunting.

And, you’ll have few advisers to turn to.

If all you do is say “Yes” the clutter of old and new, bad and good, stagnant and fresh, random and purposed… Emboldened by the chatter of non-advisers in the quiet of limited counsel will weaken your resolve and cloud the clarity of change you embraced.

It’s not easy.  If everyone embraced change, then even if you didn’t say “No” and take that critical step to reject and remove clutter, folks around you might steer you back on track.

That ain’t the case.

Instead, it’s far more likely that in the middle of your challenging and radical  transition everybody will have some unsolicited criticism and advice to offer you about you.

While they remain unchanged.

Saying “Yes” to change and new advisers without saying “N0″ to habit and old advisers is like trying to pretend one termite-infested piece of wood won’t infest the entire structure you’re building… And expecting the pest-control guy to tell you the truth about whether that piece will matter.

So we have to regularly remind ourselves that what we have, and who we are is rare and wonderful.  Actively choose to be around people who affirm that instead of those who question and judge the improved, unfamiliar you.

Actively choose to be around people who are constantly seeking to learn about you, because they assume you’re constantly growing and evolving…

Because they are too.

Actively reject people who cling in fear to the past, investing time and resources in the sequel, depleting your time and resources in the process.

Your life is not an uninspired pop song.

It is purposeful, new, changing, confident, challenging, fresh, and refreshing.

Whenever something random, old, inflexible, insecure, easy, stale and tiring  comes along, don’t hesitate to say “No.”

Because when that something has eaten away the foundation of your new structure, it will return with lies of worry about how you will recover, to keep you comfortable in need.  Projecting judgment and unhappiness disguised as jokes, concern and care for you.

As you go about making choices, remembering you have unlimited options and resources, ask yourself:

  • Am I working with the best architect or advisers?
  • Am I using the very best building material?
  • Am I choosing the best design?
  • Am I building to weather the storm or bask in the sunshine?

That poor direction, rotted wood, misplaced weight-bearing wall,  or hurricane will tear everything up at the worst time:  When you need to depend on it most. It’ll crumble before your eyes.

Your best you, won’t be easy, readily accessible, inexpensive, or unoriginal.  That means your advisers won’t be any of those things either, because they have to be the best.

If an architect offered to design, build and pay for your dream home, but you realized they’d never built anything, and tend to leave a mess in their wake when they try…

Would you see the truth that you deserve and will have the best, then follow the signs they’re the wrong one to build with?  Or would you believe the lie that they have a once-in-a lifetime opportunity and jump at the chance?

That’s what happens when, broken, we desperately take what broken folks offer.

When you’re whole you don’t run around trying to fix other people or expecting them to fix you.  And you don’t desperately accept anything from any broken body who offers stale thinking about you or anything in your life.

As you embrace change and newness,  think of rejecting static and staleness as only accepting, hearing, and responding to the truth: That’s all you’ll get or give with your best advisers.

Why settle for less when you’re the one who has to live with the consequences?

  • Get comfortable saying “No” without compromise.
  • Get comfortable saying “Because this is better for me” with sincerity.

Every second of every minute of every hour of every day, practice knowing and loving yourself enough to choose who and what affirms your best you.

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21 Ways to grow and share true love.

17 Dec

You woke up this morning, which means there are at least three people who need you to actively show love instead of passively living. You, the person whose life you’ve impacted without realizing it, and the person they impact without realizing it.

Easy ways to show love:
1. Say it.
2. Mean it.
3. Share something that moved you, and explain why.
4. Remember, and remind others you are neither better nor worse than anyone else.
5. Remember and remind others that every second is a chance to think differently, act differently, live differently.
6. Admit a mistake. Learn the lesson.
7. Treat everyone you meet like they’re important because they are, and treating them like it means you are too.
8. Think so long before saying anything negative, you forget to say it altogether.
9. Let yourself feel joy.
10. Pray for God to fill others up. Don’t try to fill His shoes.
11. Pray for God to fill you up. Don’t try to fill His shoes.
12. Look hard for, only receive, and only give the truth.
13. Remember if it’s depressing, weak, scary, hopeless or limiting it’s a lie.
14. Remember truth is limitless, powerful, joyous, uplifting, exciting, and love-filled.
15 Remember dark never becomes less dark. There’s no such thing as a little bit wrong, a little bit bad. Bad turned all the way bad, all the way dark, is death.
16. Remember darkness fades in the light. Light makes dark disappear in its blinding radiance. There’s no such thing as a small light, a little bit right, a little bit good. Light turned all the way up, all the way good, is life.
17. Comfort someone without trying to fix what’s wrong.
18. Be happy for, proud of, inspired by someone.
19. Be thankful.
20. Trust in God completely, withholding nothing from Him, giving Him no half-truths, fake smiles, hidden agendas, hard-heart. Trust Him to hear your ugly truths, your fears, your anger, your sorrow, your inadequacies and love you MORE for sharing. He’s the ultimate love of your life and He already knows the truth of it all, He’s just waiting for you to be honest. When you release it, inviting Him in, He will rush in to save the day. He really can.
21. Listen.

Shine.

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The Deep: Great ships need fathomless depths for support.

30 Nov

2012 feels like a great fight scene in an action film: Suspenseful anticipation followed by super-fast, ridiculously impossible athletic feats that defy the laws of physics and the street.

And just when you think you know what to expect, slow motion kicks in and everything ramps up.  You watch transfixed and excited, rooting for whoever has the sauciest roundhouse and most unexpected between-blow responses.

This year sped past like a whirlwind.  Now it’s slowing down, transitioning into 2013 and the next steps are not only critical, but hard to see.

For the depth of experience and height of growth that can only come with that unrelenting pace, I’m thankful.

For the dizzying days and fleeting memories attached to it, I’m reminded: Life goes by so fast.

When you’ve reached one speed and mastered one terrain, a new speed kicks in with a different landscape to navigate.

And it never slows down.  You might find yourself wondering what the heck is going on.

Or.

You might find yourself still in the center of the whirlwind if you’re in alignment.

Feeling peaceful and settled in the midst of change and deconstruction 2012 is winding up into, rest.  Watching, still.  Choosing action over motion with painstaking care.

From the eye of the storm, praying in gratitude for discernment.   Thankful for a purpose-filled life.  As familiarity wanes and discomfort grows… As questions flourish and the pace quickens, the answer to one question matters:

Is this an aching stretch to relax into, or a slow-burning pain excused and endured?

Change usually isn’t familiar or comfortable.

In transition, you need guidance to know the difference between stale and wrong, vs. new and right, especially when it all looks unfamiliar and uncomfortable.

You might find yourself making excuses for something you should be walking away from, or convincing yourself something you should run to is wrong… Because both are uncomfortable.

Only God can tell you the difference.

When we can’t see how something will work with our two little eyes, it’s really easy to draw the conclusion it won’t.  Searching for definition and a road map, we can actually get lost by turning away from what was right for us because we didn’t know it.

It wasn’t familiar.

-Touré Roberts

-Touré Roberts

Your life is a body of water: How you choose to move through it depends largely on how deep into limitless waters you’re willing to go.

The thing about water, and boats is…

If you want definition and clarity, to see and know every turn and crevice, you’re talking about a pool.  Maybe it’s a really cool pool, with a slide and an underwater light show and fountains and rocks and bubbles.  But it’s a flippin’ pool.  You might be able to get a floaty into it.  How much fun is it to captain a floaty?  A pool can’t feed you or give you water.  There’s no life in that.  It’s limited.

If you want a thrill and never-ending adventure with excitement and danger at every turn, you’re talking about white-water river rafting.  Tons of fun.  But you’re completely at the mercy of that wildly running river.  There’s no stopping the raft in still water or pulling to the shore to rest.  How long could you really survive in a raft?  A rushing river can only sweep you along with it.  There’s no purpose in that.  It’s out of control.

But an ocean brings crashing waves and stillness.  Endless, boundless space to choose to explore, mapping out where and why you’ll move with the ocean’s response.  Deep and beautiful, it’s filled with life, caves, sea creatures, ravines… You can take a cruise liner out on that.  You can build a life so solid and seaworthy, nothing can shake you and every moment is an adventure.  That’s a purpose-filled life.  Steady, sure, flexible, meaningful, wonderful.

Shallow water can only support so much.  If your purpose is heavy, your life big and your destiny great, there’s going to have to be a whole lotta ocean beneath you to support and sustain it.

That can be scary, I guess.  But wouldn’t you rather deal with potential dangers in limitless freedom than false safety in tight bondage?  And for the record, kiddie pools are indeed awesome.  But all they offer is novel and temporary relief from a day’s heat, and they only last one season.

Here’s to floating anchored into 2013 with slow surety, peace and readiness for the beautifully unexpected partnership God’s universe offers us: A perfect match for our brilliant, never been seen before destiny.

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The beauty of life: Dancing in purpose

9 Nov

This is the scene I woke up to on my 33rd birthday: A simple, elegant, vibrant daisy brilliantly and naturally lit by the morning sun.


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Image

Seasonal Fruit

31 Oct Harvest

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Renew your mind: Thinking your way into a fantastic future.

18 Oct

Every one of us is born gifted.  Each gift is unique and the distribution  is both balanced and fair.

But, our minds get in the way of using them.

If you think about it, as we thinking folk invariably do, there’s a hefty number of reasons to convince yourself to accept stuff that isn’t true: One gift is better than another, or isn’t that special.  A particular combination of gifts is mutually exclusive, logically incompatible.

Newsflash.

Gifts weren’t made to be thought into submission and hidden.

They were made to be used.

Our gifts are the most unique and special part of us and no one can judge or steal them.  We can, however, make the terribly self-defeating choice to think ourselves into not using them.

We won’t realize that’s what we’re doing.

We’ll think we don’t know what our purpose in life is.  If that’s the case, opting out of using the sharpest tools and most effective weapons we have for accomplishing that purpose isn’t such a big deal.

We’ll convince ourselves our gifts are no good: If they were so special and awesome, how could I or anyone else possibly think they’re not important?

It sounds ridiculous.

The reality is it’s never clear.  The dangerous road to self-defeat isn’t marked by the warning:

Looking for mediocrity, randomness, failure, depression and emptiness? Hide your gifts and come this way!

Instead, as with everything we shouldn’t do in life that we somehow find ourselves failing to refuse, our thinking isn’t clear.

Thoughts may be slanted toward logic, trying to predict and make sense of a future we don’t hold, control or understand.  Loneliness, hurt, pride, or anger may unhinge us, crowding our mind with noise.  Judgment may be clouded by powerful fear or tempting presentation we can’t seem to resist.   Personal power may only go so far and we wonder, how the heck would that ever work?

So instead of becoming one of those astounding someones we look at, reveling in how exceptional and amazing they must be…

We become the best dreamer we can be.

Isn’t that nice.

Then, when the infinite distance between the perceived reality of our dreams and the seemingly impossible fantasy of our life imagined begins to scare us, we struggle.  We find ways to cope with that unfathomable space.

The thing is, the distance between who we are and our greatest self is only in our mind, in our thinking.  Distance develops only because we slowly and consistently convince ourselves it exists with these thoughts:

  • “I’m not ready yet.”
  • “That’s crazy.”
  • “Where would I start?”
  • “I don’t want to be like them.”
  • “No one’s ever done that before.”
  • What would they think?”
  • “I don’t know how.”
  • “This would never work.”
  • “Why can’t things go back to the way they were?”
  • “What makes me so great or special?”
  • “Everything would be different.”

So… We think our way into burying our gifts, then think our way into coping with the suckiness that settles over life… Then begin to think it’s okay by tolerating it… Then claim renewing our mind and our thinking is something only monks, philosophers and folks who aren’t us, need to do?

I get it.  Our thoughts are shaped by everything from how we were raised, to who we choose to spend our lives with, to what we choose to listen to, read and watch, to what we eat, and especially what we worship.

Unless you were born on an island with Jesus himself chances are somewhere along the line stuff got real messy.

Somewhere along the line something or someone caused fear, hurt, doubt, mistrust, confusion, complacency or insecurity.  Then came all those misguided thoughts, convincing you it’s okay to not know your life’s purpose, to bury your tools and weapons.

Not the best battle plan.

While you can’t change what happened, you can change how you think.  We do it every time we pretend we’re having a bad day.  Every time we convince ourselves something will be super-wonderful before  it happens.

How awesome will we all be when every step we take forward is bolstered by the thinking that we are invincible, unstoppable, and headed toward greatness every second?

Before you continue down any road that heads elsewhere, stop and think for a second, about what thought led you there in the first place.  If that thought isn’t of the invincible and unstoppable camp, reconsider the instruction you received.

Think about going another way.

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The ninth month…

9 Oct

In the ninth month of the year, the number we give birth to what we carry, bring life forth from what we’ve nurtured with our own food and blood, God has wept.  He weeps because living people, pure, good and provided for ache so deeply, their wounds hurt others.  He weeps because we cry out in pain and mourning for loss.  He weeps because the pain of loss is real, the roots of loss grow deep and strong.  He weeps because life is precious.

But He knows.

He knows the mightiest oak has roots mightier and deeper than ever the highest branch.  He knows the greater heart, more powerful love will feel heaviest pain, the sharpest sting… The greatest hearts don’t break.  Even when the pain of labor is at its worst.  He knows light shines brightest in darkness.

At the grocer yesterday I saw a middle-aged man, in a grimy mechanic’s shirt and filthy jeans with oil stains up his arms zip past me with a grin on his face.  He was riding his grocery cart, full of provision for his little girls while they ran along side him squealing gleefully.  He must have been working his butt off all day but in that moment, nothing else mattered or brought him greater joy than drinking life in with raucous zeal for and with his family.

From infancy and as we get older, we look to our parents and loved ones for guidance and leadership for the right heart posture.  Even when the world seems full of lack, pain, or strife, our parents set the tone and lead us through the joy of childhood.  God bless those who have a father or mother who believes in joy, love and fun.

When our loved ones have fulfilled all this world had called them to be, we suddenly have to uncover a higher place for leadership and thankfully, it’s there waiting patiently, concerned and ready.

When we’ve had the privilege of living alongside our loves through this life, remember we were put together for a reason.  Remember it is in our own lives we honor that purpose.  Remember through their life we shared in joy, fun, and love:  Our goal must be to return to a place of honor that both continues their legacy and embraces the joy of our relationship with them, of their love for life.

Our loved ones remain with us, understanding our pain and grieving that they’ve caused us to hurt.  Now is the time to remember their loving embrace, to care for ourselves in health and strength of spirit so the tears of mourning wash us clean.

So our lives continue to honor the spirit of those who reached their finish line before us.

There is nothing given to us we can’t bear.  We always have everything we need to survive each moment: We just have to look around for opportunity and be willing to ask for, or take it.

Our hardest times in life are the spiritual equivalent of Olympic training: It is painful, ugly, raw, and seemingly unbearable.  No one highlights or glorifies Olympians taking ice baths, vomiting, or crying tears of pain, nor the people who help them get through all of the ugliness.

But they damn sure focus the spotlight on the gold medal when its given.

When pain is strongest, let yourself be washed, loved, and cared for by the greatest loved one of all: God.  He never gets tired, feels taken advantage of, says the wrong thing, judges, or does anything other than what is right and perfect, even if it doesn’t make sense to us.

Keep pressing forward.

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